Don't Fit In?

Walking the line.  Truth.  Lies.  Which will I listen too?  I have a choice that needs made.
I will be honest.  I have felt that terrible feeling.  Not fitting in.  I wasn't like them.  I didn't measure up.  I was less than "them"....what was I doing there? 
The standards of measuring up....vague.  Not even sure what they are, but I don't meet them.
  And who's standards are they?  I didn't think about that.  Someones standards.  Perceived standards.  Important standards.  Standards that said I wasn't worthy.  Standards that held me back...kept me from being what God wanted.  Standards that kept me paralyzed.  Ineffective.  Miserable...unable to function...to be part of the group.  Made up standards subtly whispered into my thoughts....at the most inopportune times.
  The first year I went to church ladies retreat I struggled with this.  "What are you doing here?"  "You don't even own a pair of high heals!"  I know this sounds funny to some, but satan doesn't discriminate.  I didn't and still don't own a pair of high heals (and probably never will..sorry :) ).   I truly am okay with this now...I am not a high heal kind of girl.  But satan whispered that to me....and for a while I let it paralyze me.  I couldn't fellowship with other women because I hated high heals and didn't own a pair.  So dumb.....but so real.
  Oh....satan is good at whispering.  He's deceptive father of lies and he's good at whispering.  He knows how to hurt....where the blows hurt the most.   Especially if our focus is misplaced......if we're weak.
  But....God is truth.  He's given each of us a set of "truths" to live by.  A tool to measure thoughts by.  Are thoughts true or false?  Do they measure up to what He's said about me?  What does He say in His word?  If a thought doesn't align with the Bible I have a responsibility to throw it out.  To realize it for what it is.....a lie.
  I am His creation.  Created by an Almighty God.  I was created with a purpose.  I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  I am beautiful because I am His........His daughter.  I am unique.  He's made me different than everyone...I have a specific purpose.  I don't need high heals to be important.   God made me to wear boots.
  But honestly, this is a battle I struggle with still.  It's not as difficult now....I asked God to show me the truth about myself...and He did.  That doesn't mean I don't need reminded.  I walk into a new life situation and those feelings resurface.
 I was recently talking with a friend.  Her thoughts of not "fitting in" at church kept her from attending.   I couldn't judge, I've been "thought" paralyzed too.  But it's so dumb!  Really...if you think about it.  We know the truth.  We have the book of truth.  We have a tool to measure our thoughts by...so why don't we use it?  I realize I was right where satan wanted me when I was ineffective.  God pulled me from that place and He will to anyone that asks.
"You don't fit in".  "You're not like them".  "You're not as holy as they are".  "You have made too many mistakes....you are too messed up".  "You don't have as much money as they do".  "You don't have the education."  "You lack experience." "You're not popular". "You're not....you're not....you're not...."
  He [Jesus] didn't fit in.  He wasn't like them.  He was sinless yet didn't act like the "holy" pharisees.  He died for mistakes.  He knew we'd mess up....He knew in advance...because we are sinners...that's what sinners do.  He didn't have money....he was a carpenters son.  His education?  .....a home taught carpenter.  His experience... three years.  He was not popular....He was killed because He was hated.
Did this matter?
If thoughts don't align with what God says ....they are a lie.